Monday, January 8, 2007

Fuath na Yuppie

Damn. Nothin' to raise hell about today except for my deep-seated aversion to yuppies. Took my Da to the radiology unit at Northside Hospital this morning, at which point the battery in my laptop gave up the ghost.

Spent five fuckin' hours scrawling anti-yuppie screeds into a ridiculously overpriced notepad I'd purchased at the hospital gift shop for the sake of alleviating boredom.

"What?", screams I at the receptionist, "No bar? No bar? What manner of fuckin' hospital is this, anyway? I drive my ass down here --on my day off, even -- contend with the awful emotional turmoil that 'comes with the territory' of having a gravely ill loved one, and you bastards haven't even the decency to furnish this overpriced pisshole with a boozer?"

Truth be told, I was nowhere near that obnoxious. Gave a yuppie or two the "What are you starin' at , fuckface?" glare, but spent the morning peacefully, for the most part. Got into a chat with a most polite and personable "Good ol' Boy" (one of the few fellow Southerners in evidence at Northside) whom I suspect was one of the support/maintenance staff over a very large and well-fed redtail (that's a species of hawk, for the benefit of you Yankees, yuppies and foreigners) whilst having a smoke in the "leper zone".

The bird had captured my attention some time before, and this gentleman seemed to be the only other person who'd paid him any notice, aside from a hospital employee who caught sight of him and opted not to walk beneath the tree in which he was perched.

This fellow noted that the bird was moulting (an unusual occurrence in January; they usually shed around the time of the equinox, which, in these parts, usually coincides with the last frost date), as did I. He then mentioned that the critter's plumpness probably owed itself to the pigeons who infest the rooftops of the hospital complex, and I agreed. I asked him if ever he'd seen the Blackhawks who glide upon the breeze at the summit of Kennesaw Mountain. He said he had, but that he'd never had one come as close to him as had this particular insouciant and fearless raptor.

Redtails definitely have it over Blackhawks for fuckin' bravery, and that I'll give them. The Blackhawk is all grace and beauty; glistening mahogany feathers, "ooh's" and "aah's" - and distance. The Redtail, on the other hand, is grey and brown. He elicits neither "ooh's" nor "aah's", but fears only what he needs to fear, and involves himself far more closely with the world around him than does his cousin.

We admired the bird in silence for several minutes, and then went our separate ways.

That's it.

Well? What the fuck do you want? The answers to all of life's questions? Let some vacuous asshole such as Al Franken or Sean Hannity ply you with those. I just like to rant, rave, and raise hell.

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